The Procession to Calvary

Published by: Joe Richardson Games
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Description

Pilfer from pirates, conspire with cardinals and perform miracles with an incompetent magician. The Procession to Calvary is a Pythonesque adventure game made from Renaissance paintings, and a spiritual successor to the critically acclaimed Four Last Things.

Huzzah! The holy war is over! Your oppressors have been vanquished, the churches of the Old God lay in ruin and thousands of innocent people have been murdered! But it's not all good news; the tyrant Heavenly Peter has escaped your clutches, and you have been tasked with the mission of finding him...

Your journey will take you through a richly detailed landscape built from hundreds of different Renaissance paintings. You will steal a ship, feed a donkey, compete in a talent contest, assist an inept street magician, sing, dance, laugh, poke a man's face, hunt for treasure and have a chat with Our Lord God Almighty... But will you find Heavenly Peter? And if you do, how will you take your revenge!?


Features:

Pointing and Clicking – A traditional point and click interface, with a 'verb coin' interaction menu and a simple inventory from which you can drag and drop your preciously hoarded items.

Renaissance Artwork – Paintings by Rembrandt, Botticelli, Michelangelo and many more are brought together into one consistent world, in a way that is also as sympathetic as possible to the original works.

Classical Music – a soundtrack selected to fit with the style of the artwork. Music from classical composers such as Vivaldi, Bach and George Frideric Handel will accompany you on your journey.

Standalone Story - The Procession to Calvary is set in the same world as Four Last Things, but it's story can be played independently.

Optional Murder – You will be equipped with a sword. This will become useful in a number of different situation, but you will be strongly discouraged from using it on people. Ignoring this advice - and murdering anyone who stands in your way – will serve as a useful method of skipping any puzzles you don't like. But be warned; your actions might come back to haunt you...

Nonsense – Surreal, anarchic comedy. Lofty subject matter is treated with refreshing flippancy. Gags about butts are taken very seriously. But rest assured, while some of the jokes may be ridiculous, the puzzles make perfect sense! (or at least adhere to a consistent internal logic)

Moments of Surprising Profundity – Actually, no... Don't read too much into it.
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Screenshots

The Procession to Calvary FAQ

  • Is The Procession to Calvary free?

    Yes, The Procession to Calvary is completely free and it doesn't have any in-app purchases or subscriptions.

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    ✅ The The Procession to Calvary app appears to be high-quality and legitimate. Users are very satisfied.

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  • How much does The Procession to Calvary cost?

    The Procession to Calvary is free.

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User Rating

4.66 out of 5

41 ratings in United States

5 star
36
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Ratings History

The Procession to Calvary Reviews

plz make more

hsjs skendoend eisn on

United States

I love these games so much plz PLZ MAKE MORE

Monty Python humor + deranged murdering + surprising poignancy

Knightrider325 on

United States

This game was feckin hilarious but also quite crude if that’s not your thing. Great puzzles, killer dialogue, lots of historical references for the attentive player. Had some insight on the nature of power underneath all the fart jokes

Need more!

Lionel Engine on

United States

These games are hilarious and beautifully crafted! More! More!

plsase make more PLEASE PLEASEEEEE 🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽

hsjs skendoend eisn on

United States

SO GOOD

LOVE

tattooedladi on

United States

I’ve played both games now, and all I can say is more! More. MORE!!!! Please make more games! Pretty please?

A masterpiece!!

Kytsprite on

United States

Another excellent game and all the elements I love! Classical painting, 4th wall breaking, murder and skunks! Keep them coming, gang. I am hungry for more!

LOOK AT MY MASSIVE KEY!

Super Mouse1234567890 on

United States

If you like art, Monty Python, and LOLling, you will like this game. I love love love love loved it.

Glitch

westy246 on

United States

Shuts down when I try and enter the theater.

Perfectly hilarious and challenging game

smd711me on

United States

Get this game. No wait. Get their first game Four Last Things, play that then get this. You will appreciate this advice and the characters come back for a visit in The Procession to Calvary. I love how you had to work at the puzzles but somehow I never got frustrated because I was laughing non-stop. Joe Richardson, you are amazing!

Excellent Game

Olympic Tim on

United States

This game used the mechanics of old Sierra games with a beautiful mix of Dutch and Italian paintings. Really beautiful. The dialogue is really quite witty and the puzzles are good. Overall game play is smooth and the whole thing is straight up fun. Well done and well worth the money.

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Keywords

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App Info

Category
Games
Languages
English
Recent release
1.0 (3 years ago )
Released on
Dec 11, 2020 (3 years ago )
Last Updated
1 week ago