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Santa, please be my husband. I know you have a wife, but listen to what I tell you. Get a 12-gauge shotgun and blast her down! I'm telling you to make sure she's not getting up Fr! Next fly over to my house. I know you like milk and cookies, so I spiked them for you Aftwr you're knocked out I will forcefully make you throw up to get the poison out, and make you my Slave for the kitchen I know you can bake VERY WELL! ÒN! TOP so please bring 6 elves so l can munch on them while I stare into your soul as you brutally mutilate yourself Soooo fine please come this instant I'll take care of the presents P.s. I really want to tie you up and knock some sense into you (if mutilating your face didn't already) Also little kiddos, make sure you ask your parents what mutulate means it's a very nice thing to do to people, so make sure you say "I will brutally mutilate you guys Mu-Til-ate Goodbye kiddos! Goodbye Santa